27 September 2006

How to Build a Career in the Entertainment Industry

Are you fresh out of film school? Are you over the age of thirty with as many career attempts under your belt? Do you love movies and/or television? Perhaps a job in the entertainment world is your next endeavor! The following are five easy pointers on looking for an "industry" job in Hollywood (and you don't know anyone famous).

Let's begin.

1. True or False: I need a college degree to work in Hollywood.

FALSE. You do not need a college degree, but it is helpful. If you have proof of higher learning, you may be able to get a better job right off the bat, but not necessarily. You could work as an unpaid intern at a production company, or work in skilled labor via grip and electric work. Actually, there are variety of options available to you, depending on how much of your life you are willing to waste volunteering your soul. (Personally I suggest going to film school because a) it's a fun time, despite the life-long debt b) I hear a film BA is the new BS, pun sort of unintended and c) hopefully it will teach you many valuable skills, half of them social if I know my audience.)

2. "Working for free?! Why would anyone work for free? Did you say UNPAID INTERN back there???"

I did. This is why it might be helpful to get a degree, so you can justify an unpaid internship with college credit. Or, if you have never been on a set, and have never had physical contact with the world of production, then sure... PA on some student films if you can. After that, I do not believe anyone should work for free. Many people agree with me, concerning these "plain as day" matters of self-worth.
Can you imagine starting in the pharmaceutical industry and working for free, even as a beginner? I can't. As unbelievable as it is in the entertainment industry to begin this way, the result, hopefully, will be equally unbelievable. If you can work your way up, you will make an obscene amount of money doing what most people, especially pharmacists, would not call "work". They might call it "hanging out" or "abusing power" or even "surfing myspace while your assistant does the same". Don't be fooled by those "starving artists"!! There is a CRAP TON of money to be made in Hollywood. That's right-- producers and agents and editors all make a CRAP TON of money. But before you can make this income, some people require you to start BELOW the bottom rung.

3. Let's talk about those OPTIONS.

It is true that everyone has to start somewhere. These places can include: receptionist, runner, PA, assistant (be it 2nd assistant director, assistant editor, office assistant, or assisting in any on-set department like lighting, electric, wardrobe, or art). I mention these because it may seem overwhelming in your job search, looking at all the different postings and not knowing the real job description or what you're qualified to do. Now, I can not delve into every positions I just mentioned, but I can give blanket advice about each general arena so you do not waste any time!
a. Receptionist/Office Manager/Runner: Anything office related can be a passport into a company. You can learn everything about what goes into production. The key here: find a company you want to grow in. It's that simple! ...and yet so utterly difficult. Good luck!
b. Assistant Editor: If you want to be an editor, this is the only way in. Make sure you want to be an editor, otherwise you will waste 16 hours of every day deep inside Final Cut Pro, unprotected.
c. On-set Departments: Get in there, get on a great team, and get in a union. You will be on set for 20 hours a day, but you will be over-fed and over-paid.

4. "Hm. 20 hours? I don't know... That's a long day..."

I'm sorry, I forgot to tell you... you have to LOVE film/television. I mean LOVE it, like you want to DIE for it. (Cause you kind of will.) Not willing to die for this industry? Awesome! I hope the whole fucking city sinks into the ocean. Until then, this is what we have to work with here, now.

5. Now, actually looking for jobs.

A recent poll in Los Angeles estimates there are one million billion people looking for the same jobs you are seeking in LA. Because of this fact, there are systems in place online to assist your search. Entertainmentcareers.net and mandy.com are great resources. Another would be craigslist.org, in their "tv/film/radio" or "crew" or "writing" sections. You can use craigslist.org if you don't mind working for people who can't spell, or do not even pretend to understand syntax.

That's it, future co-workers!! This is just the beginning for you. Here you go, off into your new careeer in the entertainment industry!! Aren't you excited? It might take years and years and you still may never ever be satisfied with your work, and you might give up way before that, but here's hoping you get that lucky break!

What?

Your own projects? Cre-? Creative control? Hmmmm.

Saving your mind, body, and spirit in LA will be in my next blog. I haven't published it yet because I actually have no idea what to tell you. I just told you this crap cause no one told me.

05 September 2006

To Hazard a Guess

This will be my "LA Mysteries" post. I will add to this as mysteries and theories emerge..

1. Bread Zone.
Somewhere between Washington and Venice Blvds, east of Fairfax and west of Hauser, there is an industrious bread making bakery. The Bread Zone, morning and night, smells of baking bread. I have never located the bakery emitting the powerful bread fragrance. I suspect I never will.

2. Cow Tails.
I suppose as a child I missed out on the semi-gross, fully-satisfying treat of a Cow Tail. I recently tried one of these cream filled caramel sticks while at home. I purchased this Cow Tail at a WaWa in Delaware. There are no WaWas in California, and after looking around at 7-Elevens and the like, I could not find Cow Tails here either. So when I went home again, I stocked up. Not long after returning to LA, my front headlight went out, forcing me into an "Auto Zone". While paying for the bulb, I discovered that although no convenience store carries Cow Tails... Auto Zone, in fact, has them for sale. ?????

3. La Brea and Wilshire-ish area, on the corner, a bakery. Lee's Croissants, from the north. Or is it Bee's Croissant's? A tiny sign viewed from the west dictates it so. Or it simply Ari's, as posted on the south side of the establishment? Yeah what the hell is called, I'm begging someone interpret the signage.

03 September 2006

I Blame Charles Shaw

This is mostly conjecture, but I can ALMOST guarantee that half of the people on the road in Los Angeles at night on the weekend are
in fact
drunk.
or intoxicated.
I can also, with the same assuredness, guarantee that one quarter of the people on the highways and surface streets of the City of Angels on the week nights are
drrrrrrrrrunk.

Those are drinking and driving angels. Oh yes. Los Angeles, with your sketchy public transit and your utter dependence on gasoline, you have made these people drive. drunk.
Let me say there are a LOT of accidents in LA. A ton. Almost everyone has major or minor body damage on their automobile. But, no matter what the rate of DUIs or DWIs, it will never come CLOSE to those individuals driving, always, under the influence of something.

What are they going to do, get a cab?
NOT drink?
NOT drive?

I do not condone driving while intoxicated. However. Everyone has done it. BE HONEST.

Los Angeles is breeding a unique race of humans who can drive under every influence! Not only can we drive during the day, influenced by complete RAGE, unabashed VIOLENCE towards humanity, stress, etc-- we can drive tipsy, high, drunk, and damned.

I just drove home from a friend's house. We made dinner. We had wine. We had more wine. I left feeling GREAT. I had a conversation with my dear friend in New York while driving home, we discussed current events and future endeavors. It was a delightful evening.
I returned home to find I could barely type an email without typos. It has taken me no less than five tries to write every sentence in this article! Yet, driving home... I was fine. I was fiiiiiiine. I was driving, stopping, going, turning, as normally as everyone else. (I can only presume they were drunk too.) I even passed a police car. No problem. Parked in my ungodly close spot in back, got home without a scratch.

Last night. I drank but two drinks at a party and at 1:30 I said, ok time to jet. I walked a few blocks to my car and drove across town. Not a care, or collision. Both tonight and last night, had I been pulled over, I would have been severely punished under law for my state while driving. I could have killed someone I guess. But Los Angeles. It's those Angels...! and...Practice!

I used to spend two hours, or more, every day, in my car driving from Burbank to Culver City. Do that for four months straight, your car is truly an extension of yourself. I was driving home tonight, talking on my phone, three glasses of wine the worse, and it was like breathing. Absolutely automatic.

I'm not saying it's right or good or definite. But Los Angeles, by nature of the landscape and transit system, not to mention the film and fashion and music and advertising industries,... we are breeding
monsters.
we are
quite
crafty.

Maybe You Should Cry About It

In January of 2005, I moved a car load of my crap across the country to finish college. It was my last semester, and I was living and learning at a satellite campus in Los Angeles. In the months prior, just about everything in my life changed, as everything is always completely changing your life somehow at that age. Things were so crazy, in fact, I did just enough research to get myself and my best friend across the country, camping alone for a week.

I did no research, somehow, on the place I was to live for the next however-long. I had already planned to continue living in LA after graduation. No research.

A lot of people love bands from Los Angeles, and they learn of the city that way. Lots of people know about Hollywood just from loving movie history. Even more people than both these groups combined have visited Los Angeles and therefore have first-hand knowledge of the town. Not me. I just moved here.

I like to watch movies without knowing anything about them. I love to read books this way too. I adore surprises. I have let blind shit luck guide big decisions I've made. Nothing bad has ever resulted from this way of living.

But, let me suggest here: RESEARCH A CITY BEFORE YOU MOVE THERE. Or, if you can, visit there, more than once, maybe even a few times and determine if you like it. I'm not saying I "regret" moving here. I learned so much in LA. I have had so many wonderful experiences. While I still live here, I plan to do great things...

Shortly after I moved here, I heard a news report that a young actress had exited her vehicle on the 101 freeway and died. She exited the car going 80 miles an hour, and was hit by no less than nine cars. Her body parts could barely be identified.

I was horrified when I heard this. What could possibly make anyone do this? What a brutal way to end it. I just never wrapped my head around the story.

So this is the city where I live. I have been unemployed for a week, and I guess that isn't that long for a freelancer, but to me it has been a long fucking week. With a lot of friends out of town, I have had a great deal of time alone to ponder, digest, delve. It's so amazing that you can feel a certain way for so so very long and it takes all that time for your brain to wake up to how you feel. And you get this THOUGHT! Your heart rejoices when your brain finally gets the fucking message! And I thought: I know why that woman jumped out of her car!!

BECAUSE THIS CITY IS A STEAMING SHIT HOLE AND LIVING HERE ANOTHER SECOND MAKES ME WANT TO END IT ALL.

This place is hell. I need to leave. I don't want to greet my maker on the freeway, but I have to get the fuck out. I have to leave. I'm going to leave as soon as I have enough money, a job set up wherever I move, and hopefully my boyfriend's company. I have to fucking leave.

Nothing is real here. I don't trust anyone. I can't walk anywhere. I pay too much for gas and a gym membership, when, if I could just fucking walk I wouldn't have to do either! And that's just the beginning of my gripes with Los Angeles...

I feel like this whole time I've been devil's advocate with this shit hole. Every time somebody insults the way of life here, I argue. I point out all the great things like the weather and the West Coast and the cutting edge and the youth, etc. I have finally faced that these things do not fucking matter to me.

If the seasons don't change I will lose my brain. I want to be cold, East Coast cold, it's in my blood. My hair is blonde. What the fuck happened to me.

In the meantime, I'm going write. I won't desert you, blog. The fish are fucking dead you stupid kid, what are you, retarded? Or just raised in Los Angeles?

Good luck to me, or it'll be biting the 101 for sure.